The Unconquerable Soul

Though one should conquer a thousand times a thousand men in battle, he who conquers his own self, is the greatest of all conquerors! ~ Gautama Buddha

Monday, May 15, 2006

I'm late with my post. I KNOW! MY BAD!

I've been contemplating on a couple of subjects I wanted to address in my comeback post. I began a couple but couldn't end the entries. So I just decided to tell you what's poppin with me.

I'm going through a major transition in my life. The Endeavor I was pursuing turned to be very successful. During that journey I have gain many new outlooks on life. Being diligent was one of the hardest things I had to deal with. I'm sure I'll expand on that on a later post.

This transition is like no other. Almost all aspects of my life are changing. This change is quite overwhelming, but I'm keep the faith that it's for the best. I'm choosing this life adjustment.

Currently, I'm on the prowl for a new position and apartment. My job has given me a great opportunity to assist those who are in need and I don't see myself growing further in my current position. (plus, I want some more money, LOL) The lease to the house my roommate sand I rent ends next month and I've decided to live on my own again... It's time to have some privacy to do you know what.. hehehe, sike nah!

Well, I haven't dated, touched, kissed, sucked, ate out someone in over eight months. I'm laughing right now as I leave out that little three minute bump session in Nov... but that don't count. I had a few opportunities pass me by.. but after having strong feelings and bangin sex with Dear Summer (my boo last summer). I know i'm better than a one night stand. Not to say, I don't want to kick-it with a play buddy. However, I went this long and will continue to hold onto my self-control (hehehe) until I get involve with someone.

While pursuing my endeavor, I had many brief moments of loneliness. I'm chill. Not press with getting into something with anybody. (this is big for me.. because if y'all knew me as smiling, I was feening to get involve with someone). It gets tough moving forward and wanting someone to come home to. And it's even tougher when you know the feeling of loving someone. Shyt is amazing! Aiight, I'm not going to go into it. But, I just feeling ready. Ready to get to know someone.

Knowing someone on a friendship level would be kewl too. I don't really have any close friends now. I'm dealing with it quite well. (that's how i feel right now as i type this, LOL) I guess because I've taken on mentoring seven young black men with one of my friends. They are from the ages of 15 to 19. And I love them with all of my heart. They are the main people that believed and assisted me with pursuing the Endeavor. It's kewl to see my impact on their lives.

My faith has grown tremendously. Since January, I have been through a couple of tough trials and tribulations. During these times, I remembered something Willie Gary said at the 100 Black Men Gala in 2004, "Tough times don't last, tough people do." So I went on to put God first and came out on top with the Endeavor. Right now, I'm praying for direction and understanding because this transition has been stressful. I'm on some type of emotional roller coaster.. I'm steady going up and then unexpectedly I drop a little bit and go back up.. and so on.

As much as I've grown, I still have miles to go before I rest......... well that's it.. i don't feel like editing.. I'll try to update when I can.

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